When we are growing up, we get used to the relational distance between us and our caregivers. We chose a distance that feels safe. We do whatever we need to do to maintain the ‘safe distance’, close enough where I …
Core Wounds
Most of us have what I think of as a ‘core wound’. It might be a belief that I’m never going to be good enough, or that I’m flawed in some way or will always be alone. It is a …
3 Steps For Self-Exploration When Anxious
From my years of working on myself and with my clients, I have come to understand feelings as messengers. I often see them as little children, desperately wanting and needing something from me—the bigger the feeling, the stronger the message. …
Stories from India
One of my main areas of interest is the intersection between Western psychotherapy and Eastern healing techniques. This interest has led me time and time again to return to India to immerse myself in traditional Indian practices of spirituality. There …
Our Need to Stay Connected
We need connection. There is no more potent time in our lives that we need connection than in our childhood. We need connection as children to survive. Without connection, we die. It is that simple. To stay connected as children, …
The Need For Connection Is The Need to Survive In A Amall Child
As small children, we have to stay connected to our carers to stay alive. Without them, we die. It’s simple. This is why they say ‘we are wired for connection’, we are. When we grow up with caregivers who are …
Anxious Attachment and the Danger of People Pleasing
The fear of being abandoned can feel worse than the fear of death. Just the thought of that person leaving you might make you feel like you will throw up, that you will never want to engage with the world …
Psychadelic-Assisted Psychotherapy
I have some BIG news!!! Yesterday I was accepted into the Certificate of Psychedelic-Assisted Therapies (CPAT) through Mind Medicine Australia, one of the first rounds of training in Australia. The training is to equip specialists to work with patients utilising …
Being Overly Sensitive to Your Partner’s Moods.
If you grew up in an emotionally unstable environment, you would have learned to watch for any little thing that might set them off. You learn to do things perfectly to avoid being shouted at or punished. You learn to …
What is Attachment Anxiety?
Attachment anxiety is when we learn as children that we can’t depend on the adults around us, so we adapt our behaviour to suit the situation we are experiencing in that relationship to stay alive, fed and loved. One adaptation …