The most powerful words in therapy are often: “That makes sense.” Not because what happened was okay. Not because the behaviour should continue. But because when you understand why you feel, react, protect, withdraw, people-please, or overthink… You stop fighting …
Tag: Psychotherapy
The Most Powerful Words in Therapy: “That Makes Sense”
The most powerful words in therapy: “That makes sense.” Not because what happened was okay. Not because the behaviour should continue. But because when you understand why you feel, react, protect, withdraw, people-please, or overthink… You stop fighting yourself. And …
Why You Don’t Act Your Age When Trauma Gets Triggered
“When trauma gets triggered you don’t act your age, you act the age the wound was created.” — Gabor Maté When a trauma wound is activated, your system does not respond from your present-day self. It responds from the age …
Sometimes Walking Away Is How You Choose Yourself
Sometimes walking away is the moment you choose yourself. It’s the moment you decide, deep in your body, “This is the last time I will be treated like this, by anyone.” That clarity doesn’t come from anger. It comes from …
Why Extreme Behaviours Are Often Survival Strategies
Sometimes what we see on the surface looks chaotic, destructive, or hard to understand. But when you are caught in extreme coping behaviours — severe eating disorders, compulsive sexual behaviour, or addiction — what’s underneath is almost always pain that …
Your Relationship Problems Aren’t What You Think They Are
You think you’re fighting about how late they came home. Or that they never put their phone down when you’re talking. Or that you’re always the one planning everything while they coast. But those aren’t the real problems. They’re signals …
You Don’t Have to Hold It All Anymore
If you grew up with unstable parents, it is common to have a part of you that was busy trying to stabilise them. That might have meant watching out for them drinking too much or trying to be happy to …
Why Talking About the Future Strengthens Your Relationship
One of the most powerful things you can do in your relationship is talk about the future you want to build together. It doesn’t have to be big, dramatic dreams. It can be as simple as, “I can’t wait to …
The Nervous System of a Woman Who Grew Up Without Emotional Support
Too many women grow up without the emotional care they need. Maybe your parents were physically present, put food on the table, and kept a roof over your head, but they weren’t emotionally attuned. Perhaps your distress was ignored, minimised, …
Has Social Media Stopped Being About Connection?
It’s wild to think that social media, once built for connection, is now mostly a stream of videos from people we don’t even know. When we flick to the next video, we don’t know who created it, what kind of …