Me, to my therapist:“But they weren’t evil. They were just broken. They had their own trauma.” My therapist:“And that’s valid. But let me ask you something… did their trauma give them the right to create new trauma inside you?” And …
Category: Trauma
Can I Widen My Window of Tolerance?
The simple answer is yes. With time and focus, you can widen your Window of Tolerance. Why does this matter? Because the wider your window, the more resilient you become. Your prefrontal cortex — the part of the brain that …
Simple Grounding Techniques to Help You Come Back Into Your Body During Hypoarousal
When we are in hypoarousal, our system begins to shut down. We might feel numb, disconnected, or start to dissociate. One of the best ways to support yourself in this state is to gently stimulate your senses and bring awareness …
Signs of Hypoarousal: Understanding Your Body’s Shutdown Response
Hypoarousal Hypoarousal is another defence mechanism. It can feel like exhaustion, numbness, disconnection from everything and everyone, or like you’re moving through a dream. You may want to sleep a lot, eat very little, and feel shut down or dissociated. …
How to Calm Your Body When You’re in Hyperarousal (Fight or Flight)
Hyperarousal is when your body goes into fight or flight. It often shows up as anxiety, panic, restlessness, feeling out of control, or wanting to run away. In this state, it’s very hard to relax, sleep, or even digest food. …
Signs of Hyperarousal and Understanding Your Window of Tolerance
Signs of Hyperarousal Most of the time, we live within what’s called our Window of Tolerance — a safe range of arousal where we feel grounded, present, and able to self-regulate. In this state, the reasoning part of our brain …
The Window of Tolerance: Understanding Your Nervous System’s Comfort Zone
We don’t live within our Window of Tolerance all the time. When we’re inside the window, we feel grounded, present, and able to respond flexibly to what life throws at us. But when stress builds, we can tip into hyperarousal …
How to Reconnect With Your Needs
When your needs have been ignored or dismissed, it can feel almost impossible to trust them. But you can gently rebuild that connection. 1. Pause and Notice When you feel discomfort, pause and ask: “What am I needing right now?” …
Self-Betrayal: Why You Learned to Disconnect from Your Needs
When you have grown up in an environment where your needs were not met or ignored, you learned to disconnect from them. As an adult, this has created one of two situations: When your needs as a child were not …
When Three Triggers in 24 Hours Brought My Six-Year-Old Self Forward
This week, I had a few things happen within a 24-hour period that triggered a younger part of me that says, “I’m in trouble.” I haven’t felt this part of me for ages, so it came as a surprise. I …