I went to see my therapist yesterday to do some work around the birth of my two children. They are now 10 and 12 years old, but I still feel a queasiness in my stomach when I think about my …
Category: Psychotherapy
Expectations
It is easy to forget that we are human when we have so many criteria to meet and areas in life to excel. When we are supposed to be in a job that we love, in a wonderful relationship, at …
Secure Attachment
When a child is securely attached, the child’s emotions are accurately reflected and validated by the primary caregiver (usually the mother). The mother is loving, supportive, attentive, understanding and able to help regulate the child’s emotions and help the world …
What is your Attachment Style?
Up until the age of two, our brain is growing at a furious rate. The neurons are connecting, and the brain is being wired, literally. In the relationship with our primary caregiver (usually the mother), we are being wired for …
Why Attachment Matters
IS THIS THE REASON YOU STRUGGLE IN YOUR INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS? As children, we are like sponges. Our brain grows to 80% of its adult size by the time we are two! At times the neurons are growing at a rate …
How to Build Trust
Trust is built in the small moments. We learn over time if the person we are with is trustworthy so when we face big things as a couple, there is a foundation of trust. We know our partner will tell …
Your Trauma Is Valid
These three things will vary depending on the individual. We all start with a different nervous system. We are all in differing social-economic environments, surrounded by varying levels of support. We are all connected to our core or our spirit …
Childhood Trauma and How it Affects Us
Let’s expand the definition of trauma. Historically, we think of trauma as big events that caused stress and shock and impacted your old view of yourself and the world. This is big ‘T’ trauma. It has become more apparent that …
Trauma Is Also…
When we think about trauma, we usually think about big things; abuse, car accidents, death, etc. But trauma responses are activated by many other things. I have noticed in my practice that people who have not experienced events that we …
Trauma Through Omission
There can be trauma through what was DONE to you, being hit, shouted at, called names when growing up. And then there is trauma through omission, things that you should have experienced that you didn’t. Were your parents attuned to …