This is something I have learned from the inside, having been in a relationship with someone avoidant for over 22 years (married for 18). Attachment and intimacy are complex. We receive many imprints about relationships from our childhood. Often, the …
Group Book Review
I have just finished reading ‘Group’ by Christie Tate. It was an incredible, heartfelt, vulnerable and gutwrenching journey she took me on—the journey of healing and learning to form a secure attachment supported by a group. For most people, the …
How Does it Feel to Have INNER Secure Attachment?
How does it feel to have INNER secure attachment? When you have INNER secure attachment: Sounds like something we all want! But how do you cultivate INNER secure attachment? I lay out some of the ways in tomorrow’s post and …
Healing Anxious Attachment
Whenever I speak to someone who has ‘earned secure attachment’ and ask how they did it, they say, “It was a combination of things”. That was my experience, too. It wasn’t just one thing. You can’t change your attachment style …
Happy New Year
My word for 2023 was ‘FREEDOM’. It was the one that jumped out when I looked at it. A huge part of freedom for me is being location-free. I live in Sydney, Australia; my family live in the UK; my …
Benefits of Being Assertive
Here’s a note about assertiveness and why it’s often the best course of action, even though it might feel scary. Assertiveness is when we have strong self-esteem and maintain healthy boundaries. Assertive communication is direct and clear and makes space …
Meditation And The Brain
This research paper is an oldie but a goodie. I love it because it shows how the body is directly linked to the mind. When people do less with their minds, their brain tissue responds, and certain brain areas change …
You Don’t Need Validation
Differentiating from your family of origin is a journey. When you come from a family with strong traditions and family norms, differentiating can be difficult, and there can be strong backlash. Backlash can sound like threatening to cut you out …
Pre-Order; Heal Your Anxious Attachment
Writing this book was a birthing journey. I thought writing a book would be relatively easy. I love research. I love healing, and I love the subject matter. But writing it was a labour of love. There were hours and …