What helped you discover a strong sense of self? For me, leaving home was a big time of discovery. Let me know below ⬇️ Everyone goes through a phase of discovering who they are, but this is easier in some …
Tag: attachment theory
”Outside-In” Referencing for the Anxiously Attached
If you resonate with this pattern of outside-in referencing, let me know in the comments. It is one of the indications of anxious attachment. love Jen x P.s. If you feel anxious in relationships, I have a book coming out …
Co-Regulation
This post is for everyone wanting to experience more co-regulation in your life. Although I’ve given an example involving a child, the same principles apply to adults when their emotional brain takes over, and their left brain shuts down. Have …
Reconnecting with your Needs for the Avoidantly Attached
For the avoidant adaptation, reconnecting with your needs, body, and emotions is part of your healing journey. There are many ways to begin to reconnect to the body. Two of the most potent ways I use with my clients are …
The Dance of the Anxious and Avoidant in Conflict
Let me know in the comments if you have ever experienced this dynamic Love, Jen
The Dance of the Anxious and Avoidant in Conflict
This is the pursuer/withdrawer dynamic identified by Dr Sue Johnson in her brilliant book “Hold Me Tight”. It is the dance of the anxious (pursuer) and the avoidant (withdrawer). I know this dance well because it is one my husband …
Valuing Your Needs
Think about hunger. We need this physical impulse to tell us when and how much to eat. If this impulse is denied and pushed down, again and again, there is a resulting imbalance and self-denial at the most primal level. …
Feeling Isolated as a Cycle Breaker
Many families have someone who breaks the cycle, know that you are not alone. If you would like some help breaking unhealthy cycles and shifting attachment styles, you will LOVE my 6-week course – Relationship Cycle Breakers. New intake starts …
Getting in Touch with Your Needs If You Are Avoidantly Attached
Have you ever marvelled at how some people seem to know exactly what they need at any given moment? Do you often feel numb and have no idea? This is one of the traits of the avoidantly attached. The avoidantly …
Being a Secure Home Base as a Therapist
f you didn’t have these experiences, therapy is one way to have the corrective experiences we need to change our attachment style and heal childhood wounds. I talk about this in greater depth in my signature 6-week course, Relationship Cycle …