With the presence of a designated scapegoat, there may be a lot of hidden dysfunction. It can be much easier to hide an abusive marriage with the presence of a child who has problems and is constantly misbehaving, etc. No …
Black Sheep of The Family
If you were labeled the black sheep in your family, know this is only one potential dynamic that might have been playing out in your family. Every family is unique, with unique dynamics. Being the black sheep can be a …
Identifying Triangulation
Have you ever found yourself in a toxic triad? I know I have. Some triangles are healthy and helpful, for example, when work colleagues struggling with a piece of work approach their boss for some help, or when two quarreling …
The Effects of Drawing Children into Adult Conflicts
One of the most common examples of this is during a divorce. Both parents are vying for the emotional support of the children. They are consciously manipulating the children to align with them. This might take the form of comments …
Statements of Self-Validation
HERE IS A QUICK ‘GO TO’ TILE FOR VALIDATING STATEMENTS. Keep these on your screen saver, print them, and put them next to your bed, where you brush your teeth. While we are changing our inner landscape, it takes a …
Tips for Self-Validation
Self-validation CAN be learnt. It is so important because validating ourselves re-connects us with our inner knowing and intuition. Self-validation is particularly important when growing up in an environment with mixed messages, where the adults around us have denied our …
Self-Validation
As a child, we look to our parents for validation about ourselves and the world around us. When we don’t receive that validation, it can be incredibly detrimental to our mental health as adults. It might sound like, “I heard …
Adventures in Israel
From the UK to Israel! It’s been about 16 years since I was in Israel. I didn’t spend much time in Tel Aviv the first time.Here are some things to know about Tel Aviv… the sand on the beach is …
Adventures in the UK
We had such an amazing time in the UK spending time with my mum & friends & family. We packed in lots of awesome adventures. A trip to Stoke Bruerne near where I grew up, Althorpe House (where Princess Diana …
The Emotionally Attuned Parent
It is so easy to be dismissive when we are parenting. We are too busy and distracted to stop and listen to what is needed. When we don’t attend to children, they learn they are not important, their feelings and …