Let me give you an example. Some of the parenting I had growing up was quite sharp and stern. Rules were not made to be broken, they were made to be followed, and there were consequences when they were not …
Tag: psychotherapy
Are you able to ‘show up’ for someone else?
When we don’t ‘show up’ in our most intimate relationships, we limit the depth of connection that can be achieved. I think most of us want to ‘show up’, but we are held back. We are held back by: fear …
Supporting a Cycle Breaker
Thank you for telling us how you feel. These are all from YOU—every one of them. When I asked in my stories what you would like to have heard instead of your friends and family’s shaming, the response was overwhelming. …
Not Everyone Has The Capacity to Show Up For You
Tough question:When you are feeling let down by someone, ask yourself this question, ‘do they have the capacity to show up for me in the way I need?’ If the answer is ‘no’, they can’t show up for me in …
Signs You are Living on Autopilot
Thinking about where you want to go in life and what you are doing to get there Bring meaning and gratitude into your daily life Take time to rest and not do anything Do new things regularly We have a …
Reasons why we might avoid being assertive
There are many reasons people avoid being assertive. I find the two biggest reasons are: ‘The other person will be upset’ (conflict avoidance) and ‘I have no idea how to do it’. Let’s take ‘The other person will be …
Self-Care as a ‘Cycle Breaker.’
A cycle breaker in a family is someone who consciously chooses to develop different ways of communicating, interacting, living and thinking to their family of origin. This can start at a very young age, knowing early that you just think …
Is It a Boundary or an Empathy Issue?
When you think about having had too much empathy in the past, has it really been a boundary issue? Let me know in the comments.
Difficulties Faced by Cycle Breakers
Being a cycle breaker is often exhausting because it takes energy to stand up and do something different from what has always been done in the family. You might notice ‘looks’ being passed between family members or eye-rolling as you …
Understanding Reparenting
Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we have been raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or …