When in conflict, it’s common for people with an avoidant adaptation to want to get away, to shut down and feel confused. This is often super frustrating for the other person who doesn’t understand what’s happening. Inside, the avoidant partner …
Tag: anxious attachment
Blaming Partner
When in conflict, if you have an anxious adaptation, it is common to get into a pattern of feeling alone and hopeless in your relationship. Rather than give up, you might find yourself becoming critical of your partner and pursuing …
Feel Like Whatever You Do is Wrong?
I have a FREE resource to help you get awareness. In it you will learn: My gift to you, Love, Jen
Anxious Attachment and People Pleasing
When attachment anxiety takes hold, the instinct to people please and prioritize the needs of others over your own can take over. This behavior is understandable because of the overwhelming fear of being abandoned. However, it’s important to recognize the …
How To Develop A Strong Sense Of Self – For the Anxiously Attached
What helped you discover a strong sense of self? For me, leaving home was a big time of discovery. Let me know below ⬇️ Everyone goes through a phase of discovering who they are, but this is easier in some …
”Outside-In” Referencing for the Anxiously Attached
If you resonate with this pattern of outside-in referencing, let me know in the comments. It is one of the indications of anxious attachment. love Jen x P.s. If you feel anxious in relationships, I have a book coming out …
The Dance of the Anxious and Avoidant in Conflict
Let me know in the comments if you have ever experienced this dynamic Love, Jen
The Dance of the Anxious and Avoidant in Conflict
This is the pursuer/withdrawer dynamic identified by Dr Sue Johnson in her brilliant book “Hold Me Tight”. It is the dance of the anxious (pursuer) and the avoidant (withdrawer). I know this dance well because it is one my husband …
Relational Dynamics Between Anxious And Securely Attached People
Being in a relationship with an anxiously attached person can feel suffocating. Small things might trigger them. Like not returning a call until after work, which is interpreted as not being committed. After a while, this all becomes a …
Dynamics between avoidant and anxiously attached
I’ve had a lot of requests for more details about the avoidant/anxious dynamic. I hope this gives a bit more insight. If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, certain combinations are …