Your boundaries are for YOU, they are not to change the other person. They are to keep you and your energy safe. Boundaries are healthy. Without boundaries our energy gets drained, we become resentful and angry and we are susceptible …
Tips for Conversations about Family Issues
Not all families are ready for family meetings. Family meetings work when a family is ready to problem-solve together. If this is not the case, then family therapy is the best place to start to lead to more self-directed collaboration. …
The Importance of Discussing Family Issues
“In your dreams!” I hear many of you thinking as you read this tile, and for many of you, that is true. Having family discussions about important issues can be a disaster for everyone involved depending on the emotional maturity …
Family Discussion Barriers
At the first sign of disagreement, uncomfortable issues or emotions, does your family ‘shut down’? Shutting down is often done to protect the individuals and the family system and is often done because the members simply don’t have the skills …
How to Approach Family Discussions about Cycle Breaking
A lot of cycle breaking that takes place in families happens without much open discussion. Often families don’t have the language or willingness to discuss things that might be unhealthy for one or more members. Things that might prevent a …
Journaling Prompts for Family Insights
Taking time to understand your family is part of the healing process. As we get to know our parents, for most of us, there are parts that we love and respect and parts that drive us crazy. If you have …
Self-Care as a Cycle Breaker
A cycle breaker in a family is someone who consciously chooses to develop different ways of communicating, interacting, living and thinking to their family of origin. This can start at a very young age, knowing early that you just think …
Do you have a Calling as a Cycle Breaker?
To be a cycle breaker there has to be a certain kind of waking up to the dysfunctional family patterns. This usually happens over a period of time, but it can also happen overnight, leaving you feeling completely disoriented and …
Suggestions for Cycle Breakers Who Feel Shamed
As a cycle breaker, it is important to understand that most of the resistance to you being different and wanting to break away from the family is based in FEAR. The underlying habit for many family systems is to shame …
Feeling Shamed as a Family Cycle Breaker
There are often comments which, when boiled down, ask “why can’t you just be more like us?” When cycle breakers emerge, the resistance is usually overt AND covert. Overt in the things that are said to you, and covert in …