Being let into someone’s internal world allows them to trust you with their more vulnerable parts. When you can share your internal world with one another, you feel more connected and have a sense of being known, understood, and accepted …
Help…We Both Have Traumatic Childhoods!
Coming from a CPTSD background does not mean your relationship is doomed. I would highly recommend working with a therapist to support you as you move into deeper intimacy and help you structure secure attachment bonds. A wonderful modality to …
Intimacy = Vulnerability
Sometimes, there is a good reason for this. Perhaps there have been some key events where you have felt unsupported by your partner or hurt by them. Perhaps your partner is sometimes an unsafe person. We can only move into …
How Might My Past Trauma Show Up In My Current Relationship?
We all enter a new relationship with baggage. When we grow up without a model of a healthy relationship or attachment, we are kind of building from scratch. The first step is to notice the unhealthy behaviours. The second step—and …
Trauma Couples
Not all relationships can work, even with the best of intentions. But coming from a CPTSD background does not mean your relationship is doomed. I would highly recommend working with a therapist to support you as you move into deeper …
Getting Upset
Here are those phrases again: “Tell me more about how that made you feel,” “It makes sense that you would feel that way,” and “It sounds really difficult for you. Know that I’m here to support you.” Let me know …
Nedra Tawwab Quote
Living with someone who has an undiagnosed mental health issue impacts the whole family. If this is something you experienced, let me know how it impacted you. Big love, Jen
Richard Schwartz Quote
People ask me, “How do you listen to people’s trauma all day? Don’t you get affected?” Yes, I get affected. I am deeply moved by people’s experiences and pain. I’m human and want to bring that humanity into the human …
Elizabeth Earnshaw Quote
Sometimes when I share that I’m upset about something, you get upset about me being upset. It starts to feel really confusing and I end up soothing you instead of myself. This often happens when you feel that you are …
Soothing Others
An additional struggle is that when your partner needs soothing, you are unsure how to give it. You might want to provide soothing support but miss the mark. This is common when you have not received it or feel it …