They may expect their partner to ‘grow up’ if they express their needs or emotions, thus pushing the other person away. This is their subconscious drive to protect themselves from re-experiencing the pain of the relationship with their primary caregiver. …
Why Are We So Afraid Of Altered States of Consciousness?
I feel sad that altered states of consciousness are not more accepted and utilised in our culture, that their potential to create deep and lasting healing and change is not more embedded in our culture. As an adult, I have …
Responsiveness is a Love Language
When our partners are not responsive, it can feel like we are playing tennis with no one hitting the ball back. It quickly gets lonely. If this is happening in your relationship, now is the time to get curious about …
Anxiously Attached People Appreciate Responsiveness
Responsiveness is a subtle form of communication and is a love language. When you respond to me reaching out for connection, the connection is validated, and I feel SAFE. It might be the smile you give me, in response to …
Anxious Attachment Traits
A snippet from my live session ‘Attachment Explained’ last week. Whenever we are discussing adaptations, I feel a warmth in my heart, that for me is linked to compassion. We develop adaptations in reaction to an environment. We have to …
The Power of Gratitude for the Anxiously Attached – 3 tips
The trick for the anxiously attached person is to let the gratitude in. And that’s a journey. When our life has shown us that we are not valued, noticed, and treasured, it can be difficult to let genuine gratitude and …
Anxiously Attached People Appreciate Reassurance
Feel free to share this with your partner! You are allowed to ask for reassurance – reassurance = safety. The most important thing about reassurance is that it is congruent and truthful. If you feel unsure about the relationship, it …
Attaching to Unavailable People
When we have grown up with unavailable caregivers, we will often be attracted to unavailable partners because it is familiar. We are used to receiving breadcrumbsWe are used to feeling a significant distance between usWe are used to not being …