When I am triggered, I know the reaction is coming from an unhealed, younger part of myself. Let me give you an example. Let’s imagine that your mother left without any forewarning when you were seven years old. She was …
Tag: inner child work
Learning to Validate Your Needs
You might find yourself being proud of your lack of needs. In the past, it has kept you safe. You have learned to rely on yourself to meet your own needs. This can create independent and highly capable people. But …
Acting Out
When you feel yourself about to ‘act out’ can you pause? Can you hold the tension and discomfort in your body and be curious about what is happening for you. Can you think, “wow! I am feeling so much anger …
What is the inner child?
Children are naturally creative. They have to be creative to survive in the world and learn about the world. They hear a new noise and want to find out what it is. They see something new and want to explore …
I Get So Upset When He Doesn’t Know What I Need. Why Is That?
There were so many comments on point 1 in yesterday’s post, ‘unrealistic relationship expectations: my partner should be able to read my mind’ that I thought it was worth unpacking. It is often the case that we think we are …
6 Unrealistic Relationship Expectations
We come into most intimate relationships with a long list of conscious and unconscious expectations. Some gathered from the movies and totally unrealistic and some gathered from our lived experience and parents and unhealthy. Any robust relationship requires work from …
What is the Inner Child?
Attachment wounding is often the result of a familial cycle. It can result in feelings of self-hatred, being out of your body, ungrounded, deep insecurity and anxiety, having an overactive mind, being wary of others, and a sense of being …
When We Are Afraid of Really ‘Showing Up’ We Run The Risk of Gaslighting the Other Person
Let me give you an example. Some of the parenting I had growing up was quite sharp and stern. Rules were not made to be broken, they were made to be followed, and there were consequences when they were not …
What is Reparenting?
Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we have been raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or …
Meeting the Inner Child
Meeting and working with your inner child is one of the things we will be doing in my upcoming course, Relationship Cycle Breaker, which launches in a few weeks. If you are interested in working on this with me, click …