Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we have been raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or …
Tag: Cycle breaker
Indications of a Father Wound
Having an unavailable father usually provokes one of two reactions. 1)𝐏𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲, “I don’t need his love”. Here we punish him, withdraw and close down. We stop expecting anything from him to protect ourselves from being hurt. Maybe …
Understanding Cycle Breaking
We all have repeating patterns or ‘cycles’ in our family of origin. It might be repeating patterns of failed marriages, drug and alcohol problems, or family conflict. You become a cycle breaker when you first see the cycle and then …
Deserting Yourself During an Argument
Sometimes it just feels easier to let the other person have their way. Maybe to keep the peace and avoid conflict, perhaps because they feel more strongly than you about the topic than you, or maybe they are implying they …
Caught in a Pain Loop
The healing is in learning how to meet the pain. It might have been impossible to meet the original pain when we were 5 or 14 or even 20, but now we can step closer. As we start to heal, …
Prince Harry, A Cycle Breaker
I recently read Prince Harry’s book, ‘Spare’. What I loved about this book was the obvious intergenerational healing that is taking place by Harry being a cycle breaker. Now, I know many of you will have big opinions about this, …
Unsolvable Relationship Conflicts
According to the Gottman’s (excellent relationship researchers), 69% of relationship conflict is unsolvable. These are perpetual problems that stem from fundamental differences in beliefs or personality. They will be something that you return to as a couple repeatedly and often …