Family secrets and discussing each other in secret can weigh heavily on individuals and a family.Many people will find some support helpful in gaining perspective and navigating these intense families. If this is you, reach out to a good therapist.Our …
About Co-regulation from a Ten Year Old
Oh, my heart! I just can’t stop watching. She’s 14 now, and I can’t believe how smart, funny and beautiful she was and still is. I’m one lucky mum!
EMDR and Trauma
Have you had a big traumatic thing happen, and you seem to move through it well, and then something small happens, and it seems to get stuck? A few things could be going on: Has anyone else had this experience? …
What’s Not Co-Regulation
Understanding what co-regulation IS and ISN’T can transform your relationships! It’s not about mirroring someone’s panic or distress—it’s about maintaining calm and helping others find their way back to a place of peace. In Chapter 6 of my book ‘Heal …
Tips for Co-Regulation
Experiencing this kind of love in a relationship is deeply healing. It has the power to change an insecure attachment style to a secure one. Over time, you will learn to self-regulate and fill in the developmental gap you missed. …
What is Co-Regulation?
Remember, healing and growth are always possible, and they often begin in the shared spaces between us. Who taught you co-regulation? Love, Jen
Why Co-Regulation is Important
When a nervous system with little co-regulation starts to receive co-regulation as an adult, it will learn to regulate itself. This is where we reach the limits of individual personal development work. At this stage, we need to be in …
The Benefit of Verbalising Emotions
A UCLA study by Dr. Matthew D. Lieberman revealed that verbalising emotions like sadness, anger, and pain can reduce their intensity. When people experience fear or anger, the amygdala—an area of the brain—becomes more active. However, brain activity shifts from …
Emotional Awareness In Relationships
Is this easy? Hell no, as Brené would say. It goes against our wiring, especially if we have a trauma history; the impulse to get away can be overpowering. The power is in the pause. When we can pause and …