We have a choice to live life on autopilot or to live life ‘awake’, but to be awake, we have to do things differently. Not everything all at once, but we need to learn to bring more awareness into our …
How to Support Yourself as a ‘Cycle Breaker’
A cycle breaker in a family is someone who consciously chooses to develop different ways of communicating, interacting, living, and thinking to their family of origin. This can start at a very young age, knowing early that you just think …
How Are Cycle Breakers Shamed in Their Family?
There are often comments which, when boiled down, ask, “Why can’t you just be more like us?” When cycle breakers emerge, the resistance is usually overt AND covert. Overt in the things said to you and covert in the things …
What Is Reparenting?
Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we were raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or conflict …
10 Signs You Have a Father Wound
Much of the mental health and psychology literature has focused on the mother and the mother’s attachment. But what about our fathers? As children, we need a healthy father figure. It doesn’t have to be a biological father. It could …
12 Signs You Have a Mother Wound
Many of us spend years in confusion, anger, and grief about the mother relationship, trying to make sense of what happened. The relationship with the mother, who is usually the primary caretaker, is the first imprint we receive about …
Is It Possible To Change My Attachment Style?
Up until age two, our brain is growing at a furious rate. The neurons are connecting, and the brain is being wired, literally. In the relationship with our primary caregiver (usually the mother), we are being wired for relationship. If …
Breaking Family Cycles
My dad was a welder. He worked until he retired at 65. He did manual labour. He worked hard. To him, being a successful adult meant working hard, being frugal and staying safe. He didn’t know anyone who had gone …
What is a Cycle Breaker?
We all have repeating patterns or ‘cycles’ in our family of origin. It might be repeating patterns of failed marriages, drug and alcohol problems, or family conflict. You become a cycle breaker when you first see the cycle and …
The Cycle Breaker’s Circle
This is the cycle we all go through on any healing journey. We need to discover where we are stuck and what we inherited from our parents and childhood. Then, we need to attend to and heal those wounded parts, …