Trauma can leave you believing you have to tolerate poor treatment because losing someone feels more dangerous than staying. Healing is the slow, steady realisation that your wellbeing matters too. You begin to see that the real loss is abandoning …
Tag: mentalhealthmatters
Sometimes Walking Away Is How You Choose Yourself
Sometimes walking away is the moment you choose yourself. It’s the moment you decide, deep in your body, “This is the last time I will be treated like this, by anyone.” That clarity doesn’t come from anger. It comes from …
Why Extreme Behaviours Are Often Survival Strategies
Sometimes what we see on the surface looks chaotic, destructive, or hard to understand. But when you are caught in extreme coping behaviours — severe eating disorders, compulsive sexual behaviour, or addiction — what’s underneath is almost always pain that …
Your Relationship Problems Aren’t What You Think They Are
You think you’re fighting about how late they came home. Or that they never put their phone down when you’re talking. Or that you’re always the one planning everything while they coast. But those aren’t the real problems. They’re signals …
If It Hurts, It Hurts — You Don’t Have to Justify Your Pain
If it hurts, it hurts. You don’t have to justify it. You are not being too sensitive. Each of us feels things in our own way. If something hurts, that’s real. It’s not overreacting. It’s not being too much. It’s …
The Nervous System of a Woman Who Grew Up Without Emotional Support
Too many women grow up without the emotional care they need. Maybe your parents were physically present, put food on the table, and kept a roof over your head, but they weren’t emotionally attuned. Perhaps your distress was ignored, minimised, …
Has Social Media Stopped Being About Connection?
It’s wild to think that social media, once built for connection, is now mostly a stream of videos from people we don’t even know. When we flick to the next video, we don’t know who created it, what kind of …
Hurt People Don’t Just Hurt People — They Heal People Too
They said: “Hurt people hurt people.” I answered: Not all hurt people hurt people. Some spend their lives making sure no one else feels what they did.Some break cycles.Some build safe spaces.Some turn pain into purpose. Hurt people don’t just …
Can I Widen My Window of Tolerance?
The simple answer is yes. With time and focus, you can widen your Window of Tolerance. Why does this matter? Because the wider your window, the more resilient you become. Your prefrontal cortex — the part of the brain that …
Simple Grounding Techniques to Help You Come Back Into Your Body During Hypoarousal
When we are in hypoarousal, our system begins to shut down. We might feel numb, disconnected, or start to dissociate. One of the best ways to support yourself in this state is to gently stimulate your senses and bring awareness …