Tag: inner child

What is the Inner Child? (big title) The inner child is a part of us that feels emotions and is creative, spontaneous and joyful. Maybe the childish, exuberant child we were wasn't safe to be seen, and perhaps they were neglected or shamed. For many reasons, as we grow, we tend to hide the vulnerable parts of ourselves and lose our natural joy and spontaneity.

What Is The Inner Child?

May 25, 2023

If you feel ready to meet your inner child and start the reparenting work, you’ll love my ‘Meet your Inner Child’ short self-paced course

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Healing Attachment Wounds

March 9, 2023

When we have a secure attachment with our inner child, we find relationships MUCH easier. The fear of being abandoned dissipates because there is a deep connection with self and a promise that we will never abandon our inner child.

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Understanding reparenting

Understanding Reparenting

February 11, 2023

Wherever you are in your healing journey, reparenting is part of it. When we have been raised by adults who didn’t know how to regulate their nervous system, who did not have the skills to role model healthy boundaries or …

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Introduction to Your Inner Child

Introduction to Your Inner Child

February 11, 2023

So, as the guided meditation went on, I had to kind of stop following it and attend to her. She was furious with me. So angry that she had been left alone to deal with everything life had thrown at …

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Regulating Your Nervous System

Regulating your Nervous System

January 24, 2023

Adults who have experienced trauma at an early age are prone to experiencing dysregulation of the nervous system, especially when stressed. Dysregulation is known to be linked to depression, addiction, anxiety and emotional outbursts.⁣ The good news is that we …

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Do you have a Calling as a Cycle Breaker? Being a Cycle Breaker is a Calling The first time you watch something happen in your family and you think “I’m not going to do that now or ever”, and you stick to it, you become a cycle breaker.

Do you have a Calling as a Cycle Breaker?

November 22, 2022

To be a cycle breaker there has to be a certain kind of waking up to the dysfunctional family patterns. This usually happens over a period of time, but it can also happen overnight, leaving you feeling completely disoriented and …

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Consequences of Unmet Childhood Needs Regression into Childhood States When childhood needs are not met as an adult, you may experience a ‘regression into intense emotional states like the ones experienced in childhood’ when that need was not met.

Consequences of Unmet Childhood Needs

November 3, 2022

Our core childhood needs are: Attachment Freedom to be yourself and to have your emotions and needs validated Appropriate limits so you learn self-control Independence, competence and self-identity Play When triggered by one of these needs not being met, you …

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Don’t shame yourself for having needs. Having needs is healthy, it is only when we try to get all our needs met through one person, that there is a problem. You’ll know this is happening because your inner child will throw tantrums when your needs are not being met. In a relationship, there are two people, with two different sets of needs. Make sure you know your partner's needs as well as you know your own. List your needs and assess which needs you can take care of and which needs are interpersonal. Think about all the different relationships that can take care of a need. For example, the need for deep connection. I have noticed that people who have deep connections with a few people tend to feel safer and more grounded than people who only have a deep connection in their intimate relationship. Think about ALL the people you would like to cultivate deeper intimacy with.

Understanding Needs in Relationships

November 3, 2022

Attempting to get all our needs met through one person is often a subconscious pattern. We all have the need to be loved, and accepted, for play, for trust and connection. Some of these needs can only be met interpersonally, …

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Unlocking TRUE Self-Awareness

What is Self-Acceptance?

October 18, 2022

Self-acceptance is a deep awareness of your strengths and weaknesses and a feeling of satisfaction despite past behaviours, choices and areas where you feel you are lacking. It is about embracing ALL parts of self and accepting self unconditionally.⁣⁣⁣⁣When we …

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We all have different parts of ourselves. Let’s say I’m at home in my PJs, and a friend calls and invites me to a bar. Part of me thinks, yes, sounds great, let's go! And the other part says, “no, I want to stay home in my PJs and watch a movie”. Reparenting is making space for the child ego state to be heard and validated. As we do this, we naturally start to access and develop our loving, functional inner mother/father to lovingly parent the child during moments of present-day or remembered stress and trauma. So the essence of reparenting is helping the loving part of self-care for the wounded part of the self. It’s some of the most transformative work I’ve done.

What is Reparenting?

June 26, 2022

When we have experienced neglect, abuse, invalidation, narcissism, conflict or violence as children, as adults, there is still part of us that is expecting the same behaviour from those we love. We learn that love looks and feels like conflict, …

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