Ghosting hurts because you have an emotional investment in the relationship, full stop. It might be a complete shock to realise that your partner doesn’t have the same emotional investment. Interestingly, for most of you on yesterday’s story that asked …
Category: Relationships
Coercive Control
I have witnessed some of these relationships up close and personal, and I can tell you that they can be SUPER confusing because the person concerned will often make you feel that you are the centre of the universe. They …
Communicating Your Needs
How do I ask for what I need? The most important part is KNOWING what you need. Often, we are not really clear about what our needs are. They get mixed up in the jumble of what we DON’T want. …
Protest Behaviours
Protest behaviours are ways of communicating. They have either been role modelled in your family of origin, or you have adapted them to stay safe in some way. For example, you might have witnessed your mother get angry about your …
Cyle Breakers Will Often Be Shamed In Their Family
There are many subtle ways the cycle breaker is shamed in the family; I hope the list above is helpful in spotting some of the behaviours. A big thank you to my Instagram community for adding to this list. …
Communicating Needs
BE HONEST – don’t hide your real needs for fear of being rejected, if you are rejected, this is a great indication you are not going to be happy in this relationship long term. If you are honest and accepted, …
Healing Old Communication Styles Where We Play Games, Push Our Partner Away And DON’T Get What We Want
Here are some situations, some old communication styles, that don’t work, and some new ways to communicate to help get your needs met. I hope you find them helpful! SITUATION – When you talk to them, they are not really …
Cycle Breakers Will Often Feel Out Of Place In Their Family
Cycle breakers will often feel out of place in their family. That’s tough because it leaves you feeling isolated. But you just can’t tow the family line anymore. You can’t listen to any more suggestions that there is something wrong …
What Does A Secure, Healthy Relationship Look Like?
I have been asked a lot recently, what does a healthy relationship look like? What are the people who have secure relationships doing? They have learnt, over time, how to balance the ‘we’ and the ‘me’, to repair the inevitable …
The Dance Of The Disorganised And The Securely Attached
So, it starts great. It is AMAZING for the disorganised person to finally be in a relationship with someone who appreciates and respects you. Your new partner is attentive, calls and texts regularly and doesn’t leave you guessing. They do …