We all have a subconscious distance in a relationship that we are comfortable with. If we are further away than that distance, we won’t feel comfortable, or if we are closer than that distance, we won’t feel comfortable, and we will do things to adjust the distance to our liking.
Now, if you happen to be with a partner who likes a similar distance to you, the flow in the relationship will tend to be easier. But if one of you feels more comfortable being substantially closer than the other person, this will create issues in the relationship while you find a distance between you that you are BOTH satisfied with.
In the end, if you can’t find a comfortable distance, you will end up doing a push and pull dance where you move erratically together and apart, which can be exhausting and painful, or you will separate, or you will do the conscious work to understand one another, to sense into the space between you and how each of you feels with different distances. You will create safety in the relationship for this openness and honest exploration.
This is vulnerable but powerful work. If you are doing this conscious relational work – well done! The world needs more of you. It is for the brave.
All my love to you on this journey of self-realisation and awakening.
Jen