One of the biggest myths about healing is that you have to remember what happened. You don’t. Some of our deepest wounds were formed before we had language. Before we could tell a story or make sense of our experiences. …
Tag: HealYourAnxiousAttachment
Sometimes Healing Is Helping a Younger Part Realise the Danger Has Passed
Today I had a strong somatic reaction that I couldn’t immediately make sense of. My heart was racing.My chest felt hot and tight.And although I knew I was activated, I didn’t understand why. The feeling stayed with me for about …
The Most Powerful Words in Therapy: “That Makes Sense”
The most powerful words in therapy are often: “That makes sense.” Not because what happened was okay. Not because the behaviour should continue. But because when you understand why you feel, react, protect, withdraw, people-please, or overthink… You stop fighting …
When Closeness Wasn’t Always Safe: Understanding Shutdown Responses in Relationships
The version of you that shuts down in relationships… probably learned that closeness wasn’t always safe. Some people don’t get louder when they feel unsafe. They get quieter. They stop texting back. Need space. Feel overwhelmed. Disconnect emotionally. Or suddenly …
When Closeness Wasn’t Always Safe: Understanding Shutdown Responses in Relationships
The version of you that shuts down in relationships… probably learned that closeness wasn’t always safe. Some people don’t get louder when they feel unsafe. They get quieter. They stop texting back. Need space. Feel overwhelmed. Disconnect emotionally. Or suddenly …
What Actually Happens in Group Therapy?
One of the reasons I love group therapy so much is because relationship patterns often become clearer in relationship. Many people can understand their patterns intellectually, but still find themselves: Sometimes these patterns only fully appear in relationship — not …
What Actually Happens in Group Therapy?
A lot of people are curious about group therapy… but also a bit unsure what actually happens in the room. So I want to walk you through it. In the first session, we mostly do psychoeducation to make sure we …
When Love Meant Keeping the Peace
Many people learned that love meant: So they became: Not because they were weak… but because these strategies once protected connection. But healing often means learning: I can be honest, have needs, set boundaries, and still be loved. Secure relationships …
Healing Isn’t Always Dramatic
Healing isn’t always dramatic. Sometimes it’s just noticing… you don’t react the way you used to. The thing that once ruined your whole day now passes through you more gently. You pause before responding. You soothe yourself faster. You stop …
Sometimes Your Anxiety Isn’t Intuition — It’s an Old Attachment Wound
Sometimes your anxiety isn’t intuition. It’s an old attachment wound looking for danger. Intuition usually feels calm and clear. Attachment activation feels urgent, fearful, and consuming. An activated nervous system can make a delayed text, a change in tone, or …