The curiosity here is around reactivity, and when fight, flight or freeze might take over for either of you in the relationship. This is a conversation that needs to happen when you are NOT in the middle of an argument. …
Tag: Emotions
When To Take A Break During A Difficult Conversation:
According to the Gottman’s, 69% of relationship arguments are unsolvable, so it no surprise that they can cause so much frustration. Have you ever been in a situation where you are both feeling unheard, misunderstood and you are both starting …
Communicating Needs Without Losing it.
When we ask for something, we risk being and feeling rejected. We are vulnerable. To cover that vulnerability, many of us will use anger or force. How can I ask for what I need and hold onto the part of …
Is It Bad That I Cry?
When people are uncomfortable with your emotional vulnerability it is great to get curious. What is their relationship with their own emotions? How were emotions dealt with in their family of origin? What did they learn in their family about …
When We Excpect To Only Feel Happiness, We Set Ourselves Up To Fail.
Experiencing emotions is part of being human. When we expect to only feel the ‘positive’ emotions we set ourselves up to fail. Part of the work is to find a place of comfort with all of our emotions. It’s a …
Meeting the Inner Child
Meeting and working with your inner child is one of the things we will be doing in my upcoming course, Relationship Cycle Breaker, which launches in a few weeks. If you are interested in working on this with me, click …
Four Basic Emotions: Mad, Sad, Glad and Scared
The incredible shame and vulnerability researcher Brene Brown talks about the benefits of getting to know our emotions and not blocking any of them out, including the ‘bad’ ones. She says when we block the negative emotions, we also block …
Embracing Emotion Helps Our Relationships
We are not taught how to deal with our emotions at school, so most of us are left to figure it out alone. When we get hurt, the tendency is to do one of three things: move away, move closer …
Why You Have Outbursts
When we push our emotions down, they get stuck in the body. WE have phases where we feel stable, and life goes on until something takes the lid off. It might be your child spilling paint on the carpet, it …
Things That Might Prevent A Family from Discussing Issues Are
At the first sign of disagreement, uncomfortable issues or emotions, does your family ‘shut down’? Shutting down is often done to protect the individuals and the family system and is often done because the members simply don’t have the skills …