They said: “Hurt people hurt people.” I answered: Not all hurt people hurt people. Some spend their lives making sure no one else feels what they did.Some break cycles.Some build safe spaces.Some turn pain into purpose. Hurt people don’t just …
Tag: AttachmentTheory
Simple Grounding Techniques to Help You Come Back Into Your Body During Hypoarousal
When we are in hypoarousal, our system begins to shut down. We might feel numb, disconnected, or start to dissociate. One of the best ways to support yourself in this state is to gently stimulate your senses and bring awareness …
Signs of Hypoarousal: Understanding Your Body’s Shutdown Response
Hypoarousal Hypoarousal is another defence mechanism. It can feel like exhaustion, numbness, disconnection from everything and everyone, or like you’re moving through a dream. You may want to sleep a lot, eat very little, and feel shut down or dissociated. …
How to Calm Your Body When You’re in Hyperarousal (Fight or Flight)
Hyperarousal is when your body goes into fight or flight. It often shows up as anxiety, panic, restlessness, feeling out of control, or wanting to run away. In this state, it’s very hard to relax, sleep, or even digest food. …
Signs of Hyperarousal and Understanding Your Window of Tolerance
Signs of Hyperarousal Most of the time, we live within what’s called our Window of Tolerance — a safe range of arousal where we feel grounded, present, and able to self-regulate. In this state, the reasoning part of our brain …
Are You Betraying Yourself in Small Ways Every Day?
Little self-betrayals add up. Saying yes when you mean no. Pushing down your real needs. Forgetting to check in with yourself. We often think self-betrayal is only about the big moments. But it’s in the small choices where the patterns …
When Three Triggers in 24 Hours Brought My Six-Year-Old Self Forward
This week, I had a few things happen within a 24-hour period that triggered a younger part of me that says, “I’m in trouble.” I haven’t felt this part of me for ages, so it came as a surprise. I …
How Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy Helps Couples Reconnect
💬 “When couples fight, it’s not just about dishes or who said what. It’s about disconnection—and the longing to feel safe, loved, and understood again.” In this podcast, I explore how Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFCT) uses attachment science to …