Feel free to share this with your partner! You are allowed to ask for reassurance – reassurance = safety. The most important thing about reassurance is that it is congruent and truthful. If you feel unsure about the relationship, it …
Tag: anxious attachment
Anxiously Attached People Appreciate Consistency
Wow – the power of consistency with an anxiously attached person. It is like drinking a cool glass of water on a hot day – soothing, grounding, nourishing from the inside. The balance here is asking for the consistency that …
5 Ways to Support Your Anxiously Attached Partner
Learn more about attahcment styles and how they play out in relationships
When You Are Overly Sensitive To Your Partner’s Moods
If you grew up in an emotionally unstable environment, you would have learned to watch for any little thing that might set them off. You learn to do things perfectly to avoid being shouted at or punished. You learn to …
Anxious Attachment and the Danger of People Pleasing
The fear of being abandoned can feel worse than the fear of death. Just the thought of that person leaving you might make you feel like you will throw up, that you will never want to engage with the world …
The Dance of The Avoidant and The Securely Attached
Something I haven’t seen talked about anywhere else is the phenomenon where an avoidant will create an anxious attachment out of a normally securely attached person. Can this happen? Yes! I know because I have had this experience myself. I …
The Dance Of The Anxious And The Securely Attached
The honeymoon phase for the anxiously attached is wonderful, as they finally find someone to partner with. Deep down they feel that the world is not a safe place, so it is safer with someone than alone. The honeymoon phase …
The Dance Of The Avoidant & The Anxiously Attached
If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, certain combinations are very attractive. For example, an adult with a well-developed adult part, let’s say he’s a banker. Quite serious, not much fun. He …
How To Be With A Partner Who Has Disorganised Attachment
Children are wired for survival. To survive, they will adapt to their environment to get their needs for food, love, and security met. In children who show disorganised attachment, the primary caregiver has been erratic, unpredictable and sometimes abusive and …
How To Be With A Partner Who Is Anxiously Attached
Some common scenarios that come up when you are in a relationship with an anxiously attached partner: You have a busy day at work and couldn’t return his call and have received ten text messages which become more and more …