Sometimes your anxiety isn’t intuition. It’s an old attachment wound looking for danger. Intuition usually feels calm and clear. Attachment activation feels urgent, fearful, and consuming. An activated nervous system can make a delayed text, a change in tone, or …
Category: Relationships
Sometimes Your Anxiety Isn’t Intuition — It’s an Old Attachment Wound
Sometimes your anxiety isn’t intuition. It’s an old attachment wound looking for danger. Intuition usually feels calm and clear. Attachment activation feels urgent, fearful, and consuming. An activated nervous system can make a delayed text, a change in tone, or …
Why Avoidantly Attached People Often End Up Loving Therapy
Many avoidantly attached people end up loving therapy. Not because they suddenly want to talk about all their feelings. But because good therapy doesn’t force vulnerability. Many avoidant people grew up learning that depending on others felt unsafe, disappointing, overwhelming, …
Why Understanding Your Patterns Isn’t Always Enough to Change Them
You can understand your patterns… and still repeat them in relationships. Many people come to therapy already understanding their patterns intellectually. They know why they people please. Why they over-function. Why they fear abandonment. Why they shut down or withdraw. …
Why Group Therapy Can Be So Profoundly Healing: Reflections on ‘Group’ by Christie Tate
I just LOVED this book — Group by Christie Tate. It reminds me why group therapy can be so profoundly healing. One of the things I loved most about the book was how honestly she captured the terror of being …
Why Understanding Your Patterns Isn’t Always Enough to Change Them
You might recognise yourself in one of these: Feeling anxious, needing reassurance, and getting activated easily. Overthinking, feeling easily triggered or rejected. Or pulling away, shutting down, and finding closeness overwhelming. Going quiet, needing space, struggling with too much closeness. …
The Part of You That Won’t Let Go Is Trying to Protect You
The part of you that won’t let go… is trying to protect you. It replays the past so you don’t get hurt like that again. It stays alert so you don’t feel caught off guard. It doesn’t need to be …
The Important Skill of Letting People Be Disappointed
Important skill: letting people be disappointed without rushing to rescue or explain. You can be kind — without over-functioning. You can care — without contorting yourself. You can choose your own capacity — and still be a good person. Discomfort …
What the Taylor Swift and Blake Lively Texts Teach Us About Friendship and Conflict
As a psychotherapist, I broke down the Taylor Swift–Blake Lively texts for body+soul.com.au, revealing what they got right (vulnerable check-ins!), what could’ve been better (earlier reciprocity), and lessons for us all. Conflict avoidant? Their bold honesty shows that naming the …
Sometimes We Don’t Need Advice — We Just Need to Be Heard
“Advice can often leave me feeling worse, even if it is well-intentioned. I just want to be heard and feel understood, even if it doesn’t make sense to the other person.” “Sometimes what helps most isn’t advice — it’s someone …