You might be surprised to know there are different kinds of trauma. Our ability to recover from trauma depends partly on the KIND of trauma we have experienced. When we have experienced a shock trauma, psychological distress in the form …
Tag: therapy
Attachment Wounds CAN Come From Adult Relationships
Attachment wounds don’t only come from your childhood, they can also be formed in adulthood. Remember that attachment wounds are relational wounds. This means that they happened in a relationship with another person. When we are hurt deeply enough for …
The Need For Connection Is The Need to Survive In A Amall Child
As small children, we have to stay connected to our carers to stay alive. Without them, we die. It’s simple. This is why they say ‘we are wired for connection’, we are. When we grow up with caregivers who are …
What is Attachment Anxiety?
Attachment anxiety is when we learn as children that we can’t depend on the adults around us, so we adapt our behaviour to suit the situation we are experiencing in that relationship to stay alive, fed and loved. One adaptation …
The Power of ‘Parts’ Work
Parts work is used in MANY research-based psychotherapeutic modalities; EMDR, Schema Therapy, IFS (Internal Family Systems), Transactional Analysis, Gestalt, Narrative Therapy, and more. It is used in so many modalities because it works. I find that it creates a distance …
Learning to Validate Your Needs
You might find yourself being proud of your lack of needs. In the past, it has kept you safe. You have learned to rely on yourself to meet your own needs. This can create independent and highly capable people. But …
7 Things To Do When You Have Been Ghosted
For me, the interesting thing about ghosting is what it brings up for you. It can take a moment to take attention off the person who has done the ghosting and be with self. It is often easier to focus …
The Healing Journey
There is a cycle we all go through while we are healing. It is the cycle of discovery, healing and then growth. As we discover, it can be confronting. It can be confronting to watch yourself push your partner away …
Why Therapists Go To Therapy
I went to see my therapist yesterday to do some work around the birth of my two children. They are now 10 and 12 years old, but I still feel a queasiness in my stomach when I think about my …
Dark Night of the Soul as an Existential Crisis
Where the Scaffolds Come Crashing Down Did you know that the origin of the phrase ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ is a poem written by a 16th-century Spanish mystic, St John of the Cross? In it, he talks about the …