As a couple therapist, I see people repeatedly move through all of these stages. If you do this well, you build an increasingly solid foundation for your relationship. Sometimes, however, we get stuck in the struggle and repair phase, especially …
Tag: relationship advice
Feeling Isolated as a Cycle Breaker
Many families have someone who breaks the cycle, know that you are not alone. If you would like some help breaking unhealthy cycles and shifting attachment styles, you will LOVE my 6-week course – Relationship Cycle Breakers. New intake starts …
Importance of Emotional Intelligence
Children can learn emotional intelligence and so can couples. What is emotional intelligence (emotional quotient or EQ)? EQ is the ability to understand and process your emotions in a positive way to release stress, empathise with others, communicate effectively and …
10 Research-Based Questions To Help You Know If Your Relationship Has A Future.
According to Psychologist Gary W. Lewandowski’s research, going through these questions and answering ‘yes’ or ‘no’ will give you some insight into the potential longevity of your relationship. The more questions you answer ‘yes’ to, the more likely it is …
10 Things To Say Instead Of Ghosting Someone
Ghosting hurts. A poll on this Instagram account into how ghosting made people feel came up with a myriad of reasons, with the most common being ‘confused’. Ghosting leaves the person being ghosted with a lack of clarity and in …
Communicating Your Needs
How do I ask for what I need? The most important part is KNOWING what you need. Often, we are not really clear about what our needs are. They get mixed up in the jumble of what we DON’T want. …
Protest Behaviours
Protest behaviours are ways of communicating. They have either been role modelled in your family of origin, or you have adapted them to stay safe in some way. For example, you might have witnessed your mother get angry about your …
Healing Old Communication Styles Where We Play Games, Push Our Partner Away And DON’T Get What We Want
Here are some situations, some old communication styles, that don’t work, and some new ways to communicate to help get your needs met. I hope you find them helpful! SITUATION – When you talk to them, they are not really …
The Dance Of The Anxious And The Securely Attached
The honeymoon phase for the anxiously attached is wonderful, as they finally find someone to partner with. Deep down they feel that the world is not a safe place, so it is safer with someone than alone. The honeymoon phase …
The Dance Of The Avoidant & The Anxiously Attached
If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, certain combinations are very attractive. For example, an adult with a well-developed adult part, let’s say he’s a banker. Quite serious, not much fun. He …