What do you do to self-soothe when you are stressed? Do you pick up a drink? Do you find yourself in front of the cupboard tucking into a whole packet of dark chocolate McVities Digestives (for the Brits reading this)? …
Tag: Psychotherapy tips
![When We Compare Ourselves To Others We Can Inadvertently Stop valuing our own gifts Kick off a string of ‘not good enough’ feelings Feel overwhelmed at how much we have to do, or change to match up Get confused about what we really want in our own life Stop celebrating our achievements Stop ourselves being really happy for others Create a feeling of dissatisfaction with our own life](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/01_05_2021_When-We-Compare-Ourselves-To-Others-We-Can-Inadvertently-copy-scaled.jpg?fit=650%2C650&ssl=1)
When We Compare Ourselves To Others We Can Inadvertently
Let’s first differentiate between being inspired by someone and comparing yourself to someone. When we feel inspired by someone, we feel uplifted, hopeful, as though anything is possible. When we are comparing ourselves to someone, there is a one up, …
3 Tips to Change How You argue
This video has some AMAZING tips to revolutionise the way you have conflict in your relationship
![How Do I Know If I Am ‘Showing Up?’](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/1-7-scaled.jpg?fit=650%2C650&ssl=1)
How Do I Know If I Am ‘Showing Up?’
When we don’t ‘show up’ in our most intimate relationships, we limit the depth of connection that can be achieved. I think most of us want to ‘show up’, but we are held back. We are held back by: fear …
![It is time to stop expecting people to show up for you who don’t have the capacity to do it? Have you ever wasted time expecting people to show up for you who don’t have the capacity to do it? It’s like waiting for the sky to rain candy. No matter how much you love the sky, it simply doesn’t have the capacity to rain candy. You can stand there and wait and wait, but you are setting yourself up to be let down.](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/Screenshot-2021-04-13-at-11.31.02.png?fit=295%2C288&ssl=1)
Is It Time To Stop Expecting People to Show-Up for You Who Don’t Have The Capacity To Do It?
Tough question: When we are feeling let down by someone, ask yourself this question, ‘do they have the capacity to show up for me in the way I need?’ If the answer is ‘no’, they can’t show up for me …
![Just how much of your life are you living on autopilot?](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/3-2-1-scaled.jpg?fit=650%2C650&ssl=1)
Living on Autopilot
We have a choice to live life on autopilot or to live life ‘awake’, but to be awake, we have to do things differently. Not everything all at once, but we need to learn to bring more awareness into our …
![What does abandoning yourself in an argument look like Your partner wants you to go to a casual work lunch, but you have a headache and don't feel like it. He feels uncomfortable for you to stay home because the food has been paid for. So you go, but you feel resentful and uncared for because you think he is prioritising the money for the food over your wellbeing. Your partner doesn't trust you with other men and argues that you would give him your social media passwords if there were nothing to hide. Nothing is going on, and you don't want him to have your passwords, but it feels easier than his constant jealousy. You give him the passwords and abandon yourself.](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/Screenshot-2021-03-29-at-13.00.04.png?fit=599%2C599&ssl=1)
What Does Abandoning Yourself in an Argument Look Like
Sometimes, we only find out that we should have stood our ground more firmly AFTER the fact. It isn’t until we are sat at the work lunch, with a pounding head, having to make polite conversation, that it is obvious …
![Can Conflict Become A Way For a Couple To Connect? What would it be like if: You started to use conflict as a way to connect more deeply? Instead of using the disagreement to move further apart, you chose to get curious? You saw the conflict as an opportunity to get to know one another more deeply? You took the time to really hear the other person’s view? You allowed yourself to feel empathy for them without fear of abandoning yourself? You allowed your heart to soften as you hear their frustration or pain You allowed the conflict to be an avenue through which you can know your partner more intimately? When in conflict, you could get curious about yourself and your partner? You could remember that we all have wounds; maybe you are feeling yours now and seeing theirs? Through conflict, you could hold space for one another’s wounds and imperfections without withdrawing?](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/1-6-scaled.jpg?fit=650%2C650&ssl=1)
Can Conflict Become A Way For a Couple To Connect?
Conflict provides an opportunity for a deeper connection. Most of us are not taught this. We are taught that conflict is scary and to be avoided. We might have learnt from our family of origin that conflict results in physical …
![How Having to Be Right Damages your Relationship and What to Do About it. Always having to be right comes from perfectionism – If you are not correct, you are not perfect One person feels wrong all the time; this can negatively affect self-esteem There is an imbalance in the relationship, with the ‘always right’ person having more power and perhaps being a bully When one person always has to be wrong, they may stop expressing their genuine opinion and withdraw from the relationship](https://i0.wp.com/cdn1.jennynurick.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/1-5-scaled.jpg?fit=650%2C650&ssl=1)
How Having to Be Right Damages your Relationship and What to Do About it.
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who has to be right all the time? It can be so frustrating. Even when there is evidence that they are wrong, they won’t openly say, “oh, I was wrong”, they …