60% of you said that your love language was what you DIDN’T receive from your parents as a child (from 120 people on Instagram). I form part of the 40% who said it IS what they received as a child. …
Tag: Parenting
How to Speak your Child’s Love Language
Children need all five love languages. As a parent you will probably find it easiest to give the ones you like to receive. This can leave the others a little lacking. I love words of affirmation and physical touch, so …
You don’t need to be in crisis to see a therapist
It is a myth that you need to be in crisis to see a therapist. You might decide to work with a therapist when: You see yourself repeating old patterns You get triggered by your family You want to be …
Signs Therapy Could be Useful
It is time to end the stigma of mental health and get support when you need it. You deserve to be supported wherever you are at. As humans we are social creatures. We were never meant to have it all …
When Core Childhood Needs Remain Unmet, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms Result.
When children are raised by attuned parents, they develop a healthy attachment style of relating in intimate relationships. When a child’s needs are not met, the child will develop ‘early maladaptive schemas’ (EMS). This term is used in Schema Therapy, …
Teaching Children Empathy Increases their Emotional Intelligence
Cultivating emotional intelligence and empathy in our children has been shown to contribute to more robust relationships, added depth of love, stronger friendships, better communication and collaboration and ability to connect to our common humanity. A powerful practice as a …
The Importance of CONGRUENCE for Children
I cannot overstress the importance of congruence when parenting. Children learn to trust themselves. They learn to trust other people. They learn how to own up to their mistakes. They learn to tell the truth. When parents are INCONGRUENT children …
Have You Ever Found Yourself In A Toxic Triad?
I know I have. Triangles are a natural part of life. According to family therapist Murray Bowen, they will form naturally when the tension in any dyad becomes too much to sustain (1972). Some triangles are healthy and helpful, for …
The Effects of Bringing Your Children into Your Conflicts
One of the most common examples of this is during a divorce. Both parents are vying for the emotional support of the children. They are consciously manipulating the children to align with them. This might take the form of comments …
Attuned Parenting – Being With Children’s Feelings
When we lack attunement with our children, they will grow up to be adults who lack attunement with themselves. It is so easy to be dismissive when we are parenting. We are too busy, too distracted, to really stop and …