Research shows that Christmas is one of the top 6 most stressful life events, up there with divorce and moving to a new house. More often than not, the expectation comes from ourselves, not from anyone else. I find it …
Category: Wellness
Recognising Unhealthy Boundaries with Parents
As we grow older, it is natural that boundaries with our parents shift. As a 3-year-old, we will need someone to come with us to the bathroom, but not as a 12-year-old. As we move into the teenage years, it …
Do you have a Calling as a Cycle Breaker?
To be a cycle breaker there has to be a certain kind of waking up to the dysfunctional family patterns. This usually happens over a period of time, but it can also happen overnight, leaving you feeling completely disoriented and …
Consequences of Unmet Childhood Needs
Our core childhood needs are: Attachment Freedom to be yourself and to have your emotions and needs validated Appropriate limits so you learn self-control Independence, competence and self-identity Play When triggered by one of these needs not being met, you …
Missing Out on the Support You Need?
Can THIS person give me the support I need right now? If the answer is yes, great. If the answer is no, know that there can be many reasons why they cannot offer that support. Know that you deserve to …
Being in Distress with a Therapist
Sometimes, we don’t get what we need from our friends and family. This doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t care about or love us. It might mean: they are triggered by you they are triggered by what is happening to you …
Understanding Needs in Relationships
Attempting to get all our needs met through one person is often a subconscious pattern. We all have the need to be loved, and accepted, for play, for trust and connection. Some of these needs can only be met interpersonally, …
Key Childhood Needs
When core needs go unmet, unhealthy coping mechanisms result. This is natural because a child needs to keep themselves safe and over time, learns how to get their needs met, however they can. For many people, having needs at all …
Your Role in the Therapeutic Process
Depending on what kind of therapist you are working with, will depend on the tools that are passed on. Some you will resonate with deeply and others, not so much. It is good to try on whatever you are given, …
Your Role in the Therapeutic Process
If you know there is something big you want to share, but you don’t feel safe in the first meeting, that is okay and is understandable and healthy. You could let your therapist know that there is something important to …