I just LOVED this book — Group by Christie Tate. It reminds me why group therapy can be so profoundly healing. One of the things I loved most about the book was how honestly she captured the terror of being …
Category: Attachment
Why Understanding Your Patterns Isn’t Always Enough to Change Them
You might recognise yourself in one of these: Feeling anxious, needing reassurance, and getting activated easily. Overthinking, feeling easily triggered or rejected. Or pulling away, shutting down, and finding closeness overwhelming. Going quiet, needing space, struggling with too much closeness. …
The Part of You That Won’t Let Go Is Trying to Protect You
The part of you that won’t let go… is trying to protect you. It replays the past so you don’t get hurt like that again. It stays alert so you don’t feel caught off guard. It doesn’t need to be …
The Important Skill of Letting People Be Disappointed
Important skill: letting people be disappointed without rushing to rescue or explain. You can be kind — without over-functioning. You can care — without contorting yourself. You can choose your own capacity — and still be a good person. Discomfort …
When the Avoidant Part Takes Over: It’s Protection, Not Punishment
When the avoidant part takes over, it’s because closeness feels unsafe. This part learned to rely on itself. So it pulls back, shuts down, stays busy — not to punish, but to protect. Pressure doesn’t soften it. Gentleness, curiosity and …
When the Anxious Part Takes Over
When the anxious part takes over, it’s because something feels at risk. This part fears disconnection. So it watches, worries, reaches — not to control, but to protect. Reassurance doesn’t calm it. Presence does. When you stay with this part, …
When You Feel Unsafe, a Part Steps In
When you feel unsafe, a part steps in. Automatically. Instinctively. Intelligently. That part is a strategy your system learned. Listening to this part brings relief. Fighting it creates more tension. In parts work, we don’t ask, “How do I stop …
Breaking the Cycle of Toxic Criticism and Defensiveness
When your partner criticises you, what happens inside? For some people, the body wants to shrink, go quiet, or disappear. For others, there’s an immediate surge of defensiveness or counter-attack. Both responses are protective. They developed for a reason. And …
Five Essential Pillars for Deep Healing and Wholeness
Each of these five pillars is designed to support your healing from a different angle, helping you move toward deeper peace, connection, and wholeness. 💛 Attachment & RelationshipsLearn how to build secure, loving relationships, starting with yourself. 🧩 Parts Work …