It is easy to think that when speaking to someone with anxiety, the best thing to do is to empathise. That might sound like, ‘I know how you are feeling, I get anxious before interviews.’ For someone with an anxiety …
Category: Health
The Art Of Re-Parenting Part 10 – Creativity & Your Inner Child
Creativity and the inner child are inextricably linked. Children HAVE to be creative to learn about the world. They have to be creative in their problem solving, learning to get a spoon in their mouth, learning how to get mum’s …
Questioning Our Thinking (The Mind Work)
I like to think of the mind as a piece of play dough that can be moulded over time. It is so easy to think “I can’t change what my mind says!” Know that you CAN because I have done …
Creating a Secure Attachment Style – Part 4
Usually we are subconsciously looking to the world to affirm our deepest beliefs about ourselves. This happens in a part of our brain called the reticular activating system. This part of the brain will notice things that align with our …
The Dance of the Avoidant & the Anxiously Attached
I’ve had a lot of requests for more details about the avoidant / anxious dynamic. I hope this gives a bit more insight. If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, there are …
Tools for those with an Avoidant Attachment Style
The avoidant attachment style grows in children as a response to a caregiver (often the mother) who is emotionally unavailable and non-attuned to the needs of the child. Over time they suppress their natural desire to be comforted even when …
Tools For Those With Anxious Attachment
It is very easy for anxiously attached people to judge themselves for their insecurity. Having grown up with a mother (or primary caregiver) who was not consistently available and attuned to their needs, these children learnt that they were not …
Disorganised Attachment
This attachment style is a combination of the previous two (avoidant and ambivalent/anxious). Disorganised children give inconsistent responses in the presence of their primary caregiver (often the mother). They seem disoriented and confused. This is likely the result of inconsistent …
Secure Attachment – A Key to Having a Rewarding Relationship
When a child is securely attached, the child’s emotions are accurately reflected and validated by the primary caregiver (usually the mother). The mother is loving, supportive, attentive, understanding and able to help regulate the child’s emotions and help the world …
Why Attachment Matters
As children we are like sponges. Literally, our brain grows to 80% of its adult size by the time we are two! At times the neurons are growing at a rate of 250,000 every minute! The neurological pathways that will …