Attachment anxiety is when we learn as children that we can’t depend on the adults around us, so we adapt our behaviour to suit the situation we are experiencing in that relationship to stay alive, fed and loved. One adaptation …
Tag: therapy
The Power of ‘Parts’ Work
Parts work is used in MANY research-based psychotherapeutic modalities; EMDR, Schema Therapy, IFS (Internal Family Systems), Transactional Analysis, Gestalt, Narrative Therapy, and more. It is used in so many modalities because it works. I find that it creates a distance …
Learning to Validate Your Needs
You might find yourself being proud of your lack of needs. In the past, it has kept you safe. You have learned to rely on yourself to meet your own needs. This can create independent and highly capable people. But …
7 Things To Do When You Have Been Ghosted
For me, the interesting thing about ghosting is what it brings up for you. It can take a moment to take attention off the person who has done the ghosting and be with self. It is often easier to focus …
The Healing Journey
There is a cycle we all go through while we are healing. It is the cycle of discovery, healing and then growth. As we discover, it can be confronting. It can be confronting to watch yourself push your partner away …
Why Therapists Go To Therapy
I went to see my therapist yesterday to do some work around the birth of my two children. They are now 10 and 12 years old, but I still feel a queasiness in my stomach when I think about my …
Dark Night of the Soul as an Existential Crisis
Where the Scaffolds Come Crashing Down Did you know that the origin of the phrase ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ is a poem written by a 16th-century Spanish mystic, St John of the Cross? In it, he talks about the …
What is Your ‘Core Wound’?
A core wound is caused by a painful experience, which shaped how you feel about yourself or the world. It then drives what you believe and how you behave. It impacts your life often without your knowledge, so we …
You Don’t Have To Feel Broken To See A Therapist.
Working with a therapist and going through a process of self-exploration and change is one of the most empowering experiences we can have. Most people have never been held in a safe, supporting, non-bias space where they can be truly …
Why You Have Outbursts
When we push our emotions down, they get stuck in the body. WE have phases where we feel stable, and life goes on until something takes the lid off. It might be your child spilling paint on the carpet, it …