We are continually subconsciously ‘reading’ our environment with our nervous system to assess its safety. Dr Stephen Porges calls this ‘neuroception’. It then adjusts our behaviour to keep us safe. We will respond appropriately to the environment, including our thoughts …
Tag: therapy
Regulating your Nervous System
Adults who have experienced trauma at an early age are prone to experiencing dysregulation of the nervous system, especially when stressed. Dysregulation is known to be linked to depression, addiction, anxiety and emotional outbursts. The good news is that we …
Parenting Tips From A 10-Year-Old
This is an oldie, but a goodie. This conversation was totally unprompted, she had no idea what I was going to ask her. How amazing is it that the first thing she says is tone and softness of voice! This …
Understanding The Autonomic Nervous System
Our nervous system functions are essential because it affects how we are physically and emotionally and how quickly we can bring ourselves back into balance after a shock or a triggering event. The autonomic nervous system (ANS) is part of …
Why Hugging is Good for You
How long to hug for? Google says 20 seconds, but I couldn’t find any research to back that up. What is important is that you have the time YOU need to relax into the hug. If you are hugging a …
The Importance of Co-Regulation
When a nervous system with little co-regulation starts to receive co-regulation as an adult, that nervous system will learn to regulate itself. This is where we reach the limits of individual personal development work. At this stage, we need to …
Emotional Awareness Supports Our Relationships
Is this easy? Hell no, as Brene would say. It goes against our wiring, especially if we have a trauma history; the impulse to get away can be overpowering. The power is ‘in the pause’. When we can pause and …
A Tip For Arguments
When we build up resentments in a relationship it is common that they will come pouring out in the midst of an argument. You start with a complaint about how they leave their clothes on the floor, they become defensive, …
Tips for Connecting at Dinner Time
I grew up eating my dinner with a tray on my lap in front of the TV watching Neighbours (an Aussie TV show that we LOVED in the UK with Kylie Minogue in it). We were together as a family, …
Growing Trust in Your Relationships
Trust is the foundation of any relationship. It is difficult to be truly vulnerable with someone you don’t trust. Trust isn’t built overnight; it takes time. In a relationship, many small moments added together become the building blocks of trust. …