Reminder: it is NORMAL to have conflict in a relationship. Excellent relationship researchers, the Gottman’s, discovered that it was not the number of disputes that determined if a relationship was robust or not, but how the couple resolved the conflict. …
Tag: conflict
5 Tips for the 5 Stages of a Relationship
One common myth about great relationships is that there are no arguments or disagreements. The Gottman’s (fantastic relationship experts who have done lots of research in this area, disagree). It is NORMAL to have conflict in a relationship; the issue …
How to Understand Someone Else’s Point of View
When we take on the perspective of someone else, a whole network of brain regions become activated. The dorsomedial and dorsolateral prefrontal cortices, the temporoparietal junction and precuneus. These areas are responsible for memory, attention, social cognition, integration and mental …
Open Minded People
Being open-minded is generally thought of as a necessary quality to think critically. It helps us to see all the factors that might be affecting a situation. It is one of the factors that protects against dogmatism. Being open minded …
What It Means To Be Assertive
Assertiveness is a skill that CAN be learnt. If you grew up in a home where assertiveness was not demonstrated it might be more difficult to understand and have an intuitive feel for it, and that is normal. If you …
What Can I Do About MY Passive Aggressive Behaviour?
Most passive aggressive people have usually learnt this form of communication / behaviour from their parents, or a parent. I find one of the major reasons for passive aggressive behaviour is essentially conflict avoidance. The thought of getting into a …
How To Cope With Passive Aggressive People
Let’s not beat around the bush…dealing with passive aggressive people can be REALLY tricky. I know because I grew up with some and I have been one at different times in my life. When someone is being passive aggressive, they …
Signs I was Healing
Someone asked me recently, ‘How do I know I am getting better, is there some kind of check list?’ We had a giggle about it, but it got me thinking about the signs of healing. When I began my personal …
The Effects of Bringing Your Children into Your Conflicts
One of the most common examples of this is during a divorce. Both parents are vying for the emotional support of the children. They are consciously manipulating the children to align with them. This might take the form of comments …
What Is Parentification?
Parentification is a potential form of neglect (Hooper, 2008). Parentification is the lack of boundaries within a family unit which means the children or a child, takes on duties and responsibilities that are usually the domain of adults (Boszormenyi-Nagy & Spark, …