I once asked someone I had just met what they imagined my childhood was like. They said they imagined I had grown up in a reasonably wealthy home with stable parents, and gone to university—the usual. I told them that …
Tag: childhood

Parental Impact on Love Languages
60% of you said that your love language was what you DIDN’T receive from your parents as a child (from 120 people on Instagram). I form part of the 40% who said it IS what they received as a child. …

Grieving Your Childhood
So many people have a childhood that needs to be grieved for. It is appropriate to grieve your childhood if: You were parentified You were bullied by a sibling There was a lot of violence There was a lot of …

The Effects of Drawing Children into Adult Conflicts
One of the most common examples of this is during a divorce. Both parents are vying for the emotional support of the children. They are consciously manipulating the children to align with them. This might take the form of comments …

Some Reasons a Child Becomes An Adult Too Soon.
As I mentioned in the last post, there are two types of parentification: 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 – Acting as a friend and confidant to a parent, becoming the peacemaker, emotionally supporting the family. I𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 – helping the family with physical …

It’s Okay To Feel Grief For Your Childhood AND Be Grateful For Certain Aspects Of It.
Can I hold BOTH the things I feel grief around AND the parts that made me happy? It is often difficult for the mind and body to hold BOTH, this is part of the work I do in therapy with …

Being the Mother of a Creative Child
All children are naturally creative. I often feel too busy to be creative, and that way of being doesn’t move me towards health or self-fulfillment. Now, when Ariel shops to randomly write the first letter of her name in the …

Hiding Parts of Self
Your inner child is waiting for you to reassure them that ALL parts of them are welcome. As an adult, you have the power to become the loving parent to your inner child and gently care for them as they …

My Journey:
Hello to all of you who are new here! Thank you, thank you for being here and being on this journey of self-healing with me. Sometimes when we are the only ones in a family on the journey, finding your …

The Legacy of a Grandmother
Energy flows through lineages. The good, the bad and the ugly. It is passed down through our nervous systems, DNA and behaviours our parents learnt, and their parents learnt. How old are the scripts that I was raised with? They …