When core needs go unmet, unhealthy coping mechanisms result. This is natural, because a child needs to keep themselves safe and over time, learns how to get their needs met, however they can. For many people, having needs at all …
Tag: childhood trauma
You don’t need to be in crisis to see a therapist
It is a myth that you need to be in crisis to see a therapist. You might decide to work with a therapist when: You see yourself repeating old patterns You get triggered by your family You want to be …
When Core Childhood Needs Remain Unmet, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms Result.
When children are raised by attuned parents, they develop a healthy attachment style of relating in intimate relationships. When a child’s needs are not met, the child will develop ‘early maladaptive schemas’ (EMS). This term is used in Schema Therapy, …
It Is Possible To Grieve For Your Childhood AND Appreciate The Good Things About It At The Same Time
So many people have a childhood that needs to be grieved for. It is appropriate to grieve your childhood if: You were parentified You were bullied by a sibling There was a lot of violence There was a lot of …
Tips for Self-Validation
Self-validation CAN be learnt. The reason it is so important is that validating ourselves re-connects us with our inner knowing, our intuition. Self-validation is particularly important when we have grown up in an environment with mixed messages. Where our reality …
Journal Prompts For Those Who Were Parentified Children
I have found journaling to be an invaluable part of my healing journey. It is time just for me, where I can contemplate my life, think through relationships and have space to allow my intuition, different perspectives and ideas to …
Results Of Parentification
If you were a parentified child, it is likely that caregiving is simultaneously fulfilling AND exhausting. Why? As a parentified child one of the ways you got love and acceptance was through caring for your siblings and / or parents. …
How To Recognise Parentification
Parentification has been referred to as an INVISIBLE childhood trauma. One study of 783 university students into the links between parentification and later adult wellness showed those who experienced parentification to have an increased risk of depression, anxiety, eating disorders …
The Art Of Re-Parenting Part 8
“Wholeness is not achieved by cutting off a portion of one’s being, but by integration of the contraries.” CARL JUNG As children we are complete, whole and unique. As we become socialised by our parents, we learn that parts of …
Trauma & Family
Unless attended to, historical trauma can be passed through family lines. Imagine a child growing up in a household with an alcoholic mother. The mother is sometimes present and caring, and sometimes she is neglectful and verbally or physically abusive. …