I grew up in a pretty obligation free zone. Although we had clear rules about behaviour and other things, there wasn’t a general feeling of obligation. No, “you need to call your mother” or “you need to look after us …
Category: Relationships
Things for Cycle Breakers To Remember About Family
For all the cycle breakers out there, this is for you. When you feel like you don’t belong in your family, you just feel somehow different, know that you are not alone. It’s okay to see patterns in your family …
When We Argue I Wonder if This is The Right Relationship For Me
When the Princess meets the Prince in the Disney movies, it is happily ever after. We don’t see the scenes a year on when they argue about when to have a child, where to live, and how much contact there …
I Get So Upset When He Doesn’t Know What I Need. Why Is That?
There were so many comments on point 1 in yesterday’s post, ‘unrealistic relationship expectations: my partner should be able to read my mind’ that I thought it was worth unpacking. It is often the case that we think we are …
6 Unrealistic Relationship Expectations
We come into most intimate relationships with a long list of conscious and unconscious expectations. Some gathered from the movies and totally unrealistic and some gathered from our lived experience and parents and unhealthy. Any robust relationship requires work from …
3 Tips to Change How You argue
This video has some AMAZING tips to revolutionise the way you have conflict in your relationship
What is the Inner Child?
Attachment wounding is often the result of a familial cycle. It can result in feelings of self-hatred, being out of your body, ungrounded, deep insecurity and anxiety, having an overactive mind, being wary of others, and a sense of being …
When We Are Afraid of Really ‘Showing Up’ We Run The Risk of Gaslighting the Other Person
Let me give you an example. Some of the parenting I had growing up was quite sharp and stern. Rules were not made to be broken, they were made to be followed, and there were consequences when they were not …
How Do I Know If I Am ‘Showing Up?’
When we don’t ‘show up’ in our most intimate relationships, we limit the depth of connection that can be achieved. I think most of us want to ‘show up’, but we are held back. We are held back by: fear …
Is It Time To Stop Expecting People to Show-Up for You Who Don’t Have The Capacity To Do It?
Tough question: When we are feeling let down by someone, ask yourself this question, ‘do they have the capacity to show up for me in the way I need?’ If the answer is ‘no’, they can’t show up for me …