Why did I write “Heal Your Anxious Attachment”?

Because you asked for it.

About two years ago, I went through a phase where I was posting a lot about attachment styles. I was asked repeatedly, “Is there a book you can recommend about healing from it?” So, like a good therapist, friend and researcher, I started looking.

I found there were only a few books about attachment, and most of them that said “and how to heal it” on the front had 10 chapters on what it is and one on how to heal it, which could often be condensed down to: “Go see a therapist”.

Healing attachment wounds is not easy, and I guessed that’s why most authors had been reticent to give a roadmap to the work. It’s true. Everyone is different. Everyone’s specific wounding is different. However, there are things that you can do that will move you towards healing. I knew there were because I had done it myself.

However, this request launched me into a massive research project, where I read some of the densest, most academic works on attachment and attachment healing, and some of the lighter, more accessible works. Through this process, I discovered that some of the leaders in the academic field of attachment were using some of the same techniques as me.

Essentially, there are two parts to healing anxious attachment. There is the inner work, which is in the book’s first half and the outer work (with a partner or therapist), which is in the book’s second part. The two sections go hand-in-hand. You don’t have to master one first. You can do it all at the same time.

I hope that this book finds its way to the people who need it.

Love, Jen