Self-soothing is one of the most important life skills we can learn. So many of us did not learn this vital skill from our parents. They were distracted, absent, or unable to soothe their child because they couldn’t soothe themselves. …
Tag: Trauma
Why Your Nervous System might be Dysregulated
We are continually subconsciously ‘reading’ our environment with our nervous system to assess its safety. Dr Stephen Porges calls this ‘neuroception’. It then adjusts our behaviour to keep us safe. We will respond appropriately to the environment, including our thoughts …
The Importance of Co-Regulation
When a nervous system with little co-regulation starts to receive co-regulation as an adult, that nervous system will learn to regulate itself. This is where we reach the limits of individual personal development work. At this stage, we need to …
Understanding Outbursts
When we push our emotions down, they get stuck in the body. We have phases where we feel stable, and life goes on until something takes the lid off. It might be your child spilling paint on the carpet, it …
Interrupting Intergenerational Trauma
Reparenting helps you connect to the vulnerable part of yourself and learn to give it everything that was not received when you were a child. When we are parenting ourselves in a loving, supportive and safe way when we have …
Deciding to See a Therapist
You don’t need to be in crisis to work on any of these things. These are all valid reasons to see a therapist. Seeing a therapist is a great way to MAINTAIN your well-being. People go to therapy for lots …
Positive Outcomes of Therapy
Research shows that the benefits of therapy are more long-lasting than medication alone. Therapy teaches people skills to manage symptoms and helps them to address some of the causes of the symptoms. There is no doubt that therapy has changed …
Complex Trauma
I would love to re-name personality disorders and call them personality adaptations, because that is what many of them are, and it stands to reason that the worse the trauma, the more extreme the adaptations. If any of this speaks …