When parents are INCONGRUENT, children learn:To doubt their version of reality.To not trust themselves and even things they see and hear.That people are not honest or safe.When parents are CONGRUENT, children learn:To trust themselves.To trust other people.How to own their …
Tag: healing journey
Empathetic Boundaries
I hear a lot of people in my clinic feel that they are too empathetic. They can feel the other person’s discomfort or pain and just want it to go away. This is the result of a high level of …
How to Develop Empathy
Empathy is a skill we learn in childhood. It comes from having attuned parents who meet our needs. With attuned parents, it is safe to feel what they are feeling. We learn that when we express understanding of our parent’s …
Building Empathy
Many people either feel they have too much empathy or too little. When we have ‘too much empathy’, it is usually a boundary issue, not an empathy issue. For those people who feel they lack empathy, research has shown there …
Cultivating Emotional Intelligence
Emotional quotient (EQ) is the ability to understand and process your emotions in a positive way to release stress, empathise with others, communicate effectively and work through conflicts. People with a high EQ have a high level of self-awareness and …
Significance of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
IQ counts for a lot, but research shows that people with a high IQ are NOT the most fulfilled or the most successful. Maybe you know people who are really smart, but struggle socially and in intimate relationships? IQ will …
Insights into a Satisfying Marriage
FRIENDSHIP was the defining factor for both men and women in achieving a happy marriage. What is friendship in marriage? It is having mutual love and respect for one another, loyalty to your partner and knowing one another’s preferences and …
Considering the Perspective of Others
When we take on the perspective of someone else, a whole network of brain regions becomes activated. The dorsomedial and dorsolateral prefrontal cortices, the temporoparietal junction and the precuneus. These areas are responsible for memory, attention, social cognition, integration and …
Keeping an Open Mind
Being open-minded is generally thought of as a necessary quality to think critically. It helps us to see all the factors that might be affecting a situation. It is one of the factors that protect against dogmatism. Being open-minded can …
Healing Shame through Journalling
When we experience shame, our gut reaction is usually to run as fast as we can in the other direction. In the moment, this might be the safest thing to do, but after the moment has passed it can be …