Anxious attachment is a healthy adaptation. All behaviour, when viewed through the lens of your history, makes sense. Always. As children, when met with inconsistency in our caregivers are faced with two choices. Either stay close to the carer and …
Tag: healing journey
When Consistency is Boring
I see a lot of people run when met with consistency. Why? When you are used to intimate relationships being chaotic, unstable and unpredictable, you end up living in a constant state of stress (sympathetic activation/fight or flight). This state …
Slowing Down
Today, I’m intentionally slowing down. One of the best ways to do that is to walk more slowly. I tend to walk with no time to spare, with the top of my body leaning a little forward. I think it …
What’s Important to Your Partner
Know what is important to your partner and make it important to you, too.I’m not talking about what kind of food they like, I’m talking about the big things, the things that your partner feels passionate about.If they feel passionate …
Marriage Tips from a Happily Married Couple (18 years) with Two Teenage Children
Which one resonates the most for you, 1-8? Let me know in the comments Love, Jen
Corrective Experiences
Whenever I make a mistake, and my husband responds with kind eyes and a soft, warm voice, he gives me a corrective experience. Let me explain. When I was born, my father was 52 years old. He was old enough …
Shape-Shifting
When we people-please, it is often the younger parts of us that are afraid of being rejected or hurt that take over.
Safe In a Relationship
When you don’t feel safe, the usual thing to do is to adapt your behaviour to create the most safety possible. This is when we people-please and shape-shift for approval or to keep the peace. When this happens, the need …