A lot of cycle breaking that takes place in families happens without much open discussion. Often families don’t have the language or willingness to discuss things which might be unhealthy for one or more members. Things that might prevent a …
Tag: Family
Understanding Why the People in Your Family Are as they Are
Taking time to understand your family is part of the healing process. As we get to know our parents, for most of us there are parts that we love and respect and parts that drive us crazy. If you have …
How to Support Yourself as a ‘Cycle Breaker’
A cycle breaker in a family is someone who consciously chooses to develop different ways of communicating, interacting, living and thinking to their family of origin. This can start at a very young age, knowing early that you just think …
Being a Cycle Breaker is a Calling
To be a cycle breaker there has to be a certain kind of waking up to the dysfunctional family patterns. This usually happens over a period of time, but it can also happen over-night, leaving you feeling completely disorientated and …
How to Respond to Shaming Comments as a Cycle Breaker
As a cycle breaker it is important to understand that most of the resistance to you being different and wanting to break away from the family is based in FEAR. The underlying habit for many family systems is to shame …
How Cycle Breakers are Shamed in their Family
Being a cycle breaker is often exhausting because it takes energy to stand up and do something different to what has always been done in the family. You might notice ‘looks’ being passed between members, or eye rolling as you …
How to Speak your Child’s Love Language
Children need all five love languages. As a parent you will probably find it easiest to give the ones you like to receive. This can leave the others a little lacking. I love words of affirmation and physical touch, so …
An Intentional Holiday Season
It is so easy to get swept up in the spending, the drinks, the food. Have you paused to contemplate what you would like for this holiday season? Right now, take a moment and make a list of what YOU …
Dark Night of the Soul
Fifteen years ago today, I married my best friend. It was, hands down, the hardest thing I have ever done. We came from different socioeconomic backgrounds, different cultures, different countries, but hardest of all, we came from different religions. We …
How do I Protect Myself as a Therapist
Do we need protecting from people? Sometimes, I think the answer is definitely yes, and sometimes not. Do I need to protect myself as a therapist? I like to think about this in terms of protective factors. I have been …