Coercive Control

I have witnessed some of these relationships up close and personal, and I can tell you that they can be SUPER confusing because the person concerned will often make you feel that you are the centre of the universe. They will shower you with love and devotion, which feels and sometimes is, real. 

But with this great love comes a deep need for control when the person involved is paranoid and emotionally dependent. A drive comes forward to control and restricts the other person.

It can start very subtly. Little comments that they don’t like your family, making a fuss every time you see your friends and family until it just becomes too hard. You stop seeing them. 

The paranoia. At first, it might be flattering. He cares about where I am. Then he starts to insinuate that you have met someone while you were out getting the groceries or at work. Then to prove he can trust you, he wants you to have your location turned on your phone all the time. Then he is checking your work emails and private messages.

It is essential to know the red flags because coercive control is a predictor of physical violence. I would love to see this become a crime in Australia as it is in England and Wales.

P.s. I have used gender-specific pronouns here because, statistically, the perpetrators are 97% men