As a cycle breaker, it is common to get push back. Push back sounds like this: Do you think you are better than us? Why are you making such a fuss? You are so over-sensitive. Why do you always have …
Category: Wellness
The Dance Of The Avoidant & The Anxiously Attached
If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, certain combinations are very attractive. For example, an adult with a well-developed adult part, let’s say he’s a banker. Quite serious, not much fun. He …
How To Be With A Partner Who Has Disorganised Attachment
Children are wired for survival. To survive, they will adapt to their environment to get their needs for food, love, and security met. In children who show disorganised attachment, the primary caregiver has been erratic, unpredictable and sometimes abusive and …
Where is Your Energy Going?
At some point, many of us will find ourselves contemplating what is meaningful. What is life about for me? My time here is limited, so what would a meaningful life look like for me? Here are some things to ponder …
Disorganised Attachment
This attachment style is a combination of the previous two (avoidant and ambivalent/anxious). Disorganised children give inconsistent responses in the presence of their primary caregiver (often the mother). They seem disoriented and confused. This is likely the result of erratic …
How to Get to Self-Love
I remember when I first heard about the concept of self-love. It was totally foreign. What did it mean to love yourself? I had only ever been taught that it was good to love others, to be kind to others. …
Trauma Is Also…
When we think about trauma, we usually think about big things; abuse, car accidents, death, etc. But trauma responses are activated by many other things. I have noticed in my practice that people who have not experienced events that we …
Trauma Through Omission
There can be trauma through what was DONE to you, being hit, shouted at, called names when growing up. And then there is trauma through omission, things that you should have experienced that you didn’t. Were your parents attuned to …
Healing Takes Time
Have you ever become frustrated with yourself on your healing journey? Thinking: Why are relationships still so difficult for me? Why do I still react like a child around my parents? Why do I still feel anxious all the time? …
When To Take A Break During A Difficult Conversation:
According to the Gottman’s, 69% of relationship arguments are unsolvable, so it no surprise that they can cause so much frustration. Have you ever been in a situation where you are both feeling unheard, misunderstood and you are both starting …