The last time I ‘acted out’, my inner child was trying to defend me. She felt that the other person had unjustly exaggerated a mistake I had made, and her response was ‘fight’. She was trying to protect me.
When I understood this and could validate her experience, her reaction made sense. I spent some time with her and let her know that I was going to take care of what happened and be curious with the other person about what had happened for them. Once I had listened and validated her, she was happy to explore what had happened for the other person.
It is great to remember that a lot of ‘fight’ behaviour is a part of us that is trying desperately to protect us.