So many people ask me, “How do I become more assertive?” Being assertive involves facing your fears—whether it’s the fear of rejection, being laughed at, or dismissed. Remember, the more assertive you become, the less resentful you will feel. It’s …
Tag: communication
The Anxious Avoidant DynamicHow communication gets complicatedThe Anxious Avoidant Dynamic
The Anxious / Avoidant Dynamic and how communication can get complicated.
Relationships Are Built, Not Found.
Intimacy is not measured on a consistent upward continuum. Instead, it is a wiggly upward line. Naturally, there are times in your relationship when you feel more or less connected. More connected – on a date night, with time and …
Checking In
Ask each other, ‘How are you really doing? What’s on your mind?’ Listen with empathy, without rushing to solve or judge.” When do you do this as a couple?
Secure Attachment Grows in Small Moments
Every little look, every quiet word, every shared smile between you and your partner is a thread in the tapestry of your connection. It’s the daily, gentle moments that build a secure attachment, not just the grand declarations. In the …
Family Secrets
Did you have to hold a secret for an adult in your family or keep a secret from the rest of your family? Keeping secrets in families, especially across generations, can harm the family and the secret holder. Take the …
I’m Anxious, and My partner is Avoidantly Attached. Will it ever work?
The risk is the reenactment of the original wounds that created your attachment style in the first place. The opportunity here is for deep healing for both of you. Wherever you are on the spectrum, if you are serious about …
5 Ways to Increase Intimacy with Your Avoidantly Attached Partner
The key with the avoidantly attached is to remember that when they pull back, they are often just as upset as you. It is their coping mechanism that pulls them into solitude to self-soothe. This is how they did it …
I’m Trying To Make Them Understand
Have you ever found yourself repeating yourself and trying to say the same thing in a hundred different ways to be understood? I know I have.
5 Tips for the 5 Stages of a Relationship
One common myth about great relationships is that there are no arguments or disagreements. The Gottman’s, fantastic relationship experts who have done lots of research in this area, disagree. It is NORMAL to have conflict in a relationship; the issue …