Avoidantly attached people often have a well-developed ‘inner adult’. They are stable, secure and seem to have it all worked out. This can be very attractive for people who have a well developed ‘inner child’. They feel safe with this adult in their life; they can play while the other person takes on the serious role while the avoidant is highly attracted to the playfulness in the other person they struggle to access in themselves. Sounds familiar?
Be careful that this doesn’t become a fixed role, where the avoidant is all serious, and the other person just gets to play. The challenge for the avoidant is to access more of their playfulness and for the other person to be a grown-up when it is needed.