Relational Trauma Requires Relational Healing

We can learn to self-regulate as adults, but this is only part of the process. The other part is the healing that happens in a two-person system – relationally. Relational trauma requires relational healing.

The wounds of childhood trauma are relational wounds. They happened in the moments of neglect, abuse, self-centredness and carelessness. This kind of trauma can create a distrust of all people, as you have learnt that people are not to be trusted. They are not safe. 

As we use psychotherapeutic skills to increase our self-regulation, we are working alone to change the childhood patterns that manifest in our adult life. This is PART of the work.

In a two-person system, there are two bodies and two nervous systems; two complete systems interact. With an attuned therapist, it is possible to heal relational trauma. 

Let me know if you have had this experience