People with avoidant attachment ARE able to love and be in fulfilling relationships. They subconsciously use avoidance as a way to protect themselves. It is an adaptation developed from childhood as a response to a caregiver (often the mother) who …
Tag: attachment style
Tools for those with an Avoidant Attachment Style
The avoidant attachment style grows in children due to a caregiver (often the mother) who is emotionally unavailable and non-attuned to the child’s needs. Over time they suppress their natural desire to be comforted even when they are ill. These …
How To Be With A Partner Who Is Anxiously Attached
Some common scenarios that come up when you are in a relationship with an anxiously attached partner: You have a busy day at work and couldn’t return his call and have received ten text messages which become more and more …
Tools For Those With Anxious Attachment
It is common for anxiously attached people to judge themselves for their insecurity. Having grown up with a mother (or primary caregiver) who was not consistently available and attuned to their needs, these children learnt that they were not important, …
Disorganised Attachment
This attachment style is a combination of the previous two (avoidant and ambivalent/anxious). Disorganised children give inconsistent responses in the presence of their primary caregiver (often the mother). They seem disoriented and confused. This is likely the result of erratic …
Ambivalent (Anxious) Attachment
All attachment styles are the child’s response to the mother’s behaviour (or primary caregiver). The child’s brain is being wired in specific directions regarding intimate relationships, based on the primary relationship; with the mother. There can be a few reasons …
Secure Attachment
When a child is securely attached, the child’s emotions are accurately reflected and validated by the primary caregiver (usually the mother). The mother is loving, supportive, attentive, understanding and able to help regulate the child’s emotions and help the world …
Why Attachment Matters
IS THIS THE REASON YOU STRUGGLE IN YOUR INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS? As children, we are like sponges. Our brain grows to 80% of its adult size by the time we are two! At times the neurons are growing at a rate …
Healing Takes Time
Have you ever become frustrated with yourself on your healing journey? Thinking: Why are relationships still so difficult for me? Why do I still react like a child around my parents? Why do I still feel anxious all the time? …